Don't Be That Guy

Have you ever met that guy?

When I worked in a restaurant I came accross "that guy" a lot. He (sometimes a she) is a person that can't seem to do or understand very obvious tasks while dining out. This forces you to discuss his/her inability to grasp obvious concepts with your co-workers. These discussions usually take place in the server station, in the kitchen or in the dishroom. They go something like this.

"Can you believe that guy at table 13? He asked for a cheeseburger hold the cheese. When I said "you mean a hamburger", he said, "no, a cheeseburger without the cheese"."

This is not a hamburger. This is a cheeseburger hold the cheese.

or like this.....

"You see that guy on the patio, this is the third time I had to return his omlette, something about it being to egg-y."

sometimes they travel in groups....

"You see those guys sitting in the 30's, they asked for seperate checks and then said they are in a hurry to leave."

That guy usually fails to find the bathrooms that have a huge sign over it, can't find the check that has been placed at the table for over 20 minutes and seem to work on the simple formula (5 actual minutes = 20 perceived minutes + one loud complaint to manager = discounted food).

I can't find the restrooms, this sign is in the way.

So I got to thinking, restaurants can't be the only place that run into that guy. That guy must go banks, the gym, grocery stores, etc.

Then I thought, is it possible that I could be that guy when I go someplace I'm not as familiar with? No, there is no way I'm that guy because 1) I follow all posted rules 2) I try to be effecient and considerate of others people's time 3) I'm and Iowan and finally 4) that guy is annoying and I'm a pleasure to be around.

And then I went to the Home Depot yesterday and did the following things.

After searching for a cart for over 10 minutes, I found the most gnarly looking thing that was half cart/half beast which screeched the entire time I pushed/pulled it around ,which happened to be a mere 45 minutes.

This picture looks like my cart sounded.

After pulling my cart-beast around for the first 15 minutes, I couldn't find the outdoor lightbulbs. That's when I  caught the attention of one of the many employees who, if I didn't know better was trying to avoid me,  and she kindly pointed  me in the direction of my lightbulbs which oddly enough were 2 inches to the left of where I was standing. We had a good laugh over that one.

When I arrived at the self check out counter, I went up to one that had been open for a while and proceeded to check-out only to discover I had gotten the wrong lightbulbs. That was no problem as the cashier said she would hold my spot, the 5 people in line were nice and didn't mind. One even told me I was #1.

See, the line wasn't too long.

Once I retuned to my check out station, I tried repeatedly to find the debit machine to pay for my items. It appeared it was hiding under the big yellow sign that said, "CASH ONLY" (which I had none of). But that too was ok since the cashier was there to help me and let me cut in front of about 6 people.

What a relief  it is to realize that I'm not that guy.